Turned
by kasumi.EFP
Summary: Setting during second season (episode "What's my line?"). Buffy is turned into a vampire by Spike, after Drusilla's healing ritual.
1. Chapter 1

**Turned**

**by Kasumi**

_Disclaimer__: All the characters, places and quotes are the property of their respective owners, that are Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Productions. I'm not writing for profit and no copyright infringement is intended._

_Genere__: What If, dramatic, introspective._

_Rating__: Probably NC17_

_Summary__: Setting during second season (episode "What's my line?"). Buffy is turned into a vampire by Spike, after Drusilla's healing ritual._

___Thanks to Carol (Spike is the Big Bad) for beta-reading this story ^_^_

**Chapter 1  
**

Buffy closed her eyes for a moment and wished that nightmare would just end, that she could escape.

She tightened and relaxed her fists several times, trying to recover the feeling in her arms.

Her wrists were secured with steel cuffs that were connected to two spots on the wall at her sides by strong chains; forcing her arm to spread eagle, insuring discomfort.

When she opened her eyes she was confronted by the evil creature that started the nightmare, the one that kept it going.

Spike returned her glare, studying her. He wasn't sure what he should do with her.

His eyes were two tight slits, his lips clenched and tense. His pale complexion was even more spectral under the soft light supplied by the candles.

Buffy wondered if her skin was like his. She would have looked in a mirror to check, but she realized she couldn't do it. The knowledge made her stomach twist with dread. Even if she could manage to escape from him, she wouldn't be able to check her reflection anymore.

-o-

It had been several hours since Buffy woke up chained and disoriented.  
Several long hours saturated in anger, a sense of defeat, shame ... and concern. There were many other emotions, even incoherent with each other, all filling her mind and clouding her eyes, making her head hurt.

Refusing to focus on what she had become, her mind retraced the events that carried her to that point.

The moment she met that damned vampire for the first time, outside the Bronze. When he told her he would kill her.

Then, the parent-teacher night, that had the risk of becoming a slaughter the instant _he _and his consort burst through the door. She could still hear the guys screaming, running away across the exits, as her mother holed up with some teachers in a little room. Xander told her how Angel used him to distract Spike, and how he shivered as a leaf between the two vampires.

And her mother, God, _her mother carrying an axe to defend her!_

Then there was the effort to distract her from the ritual to cure his companion, sending the warriors from Taraka's order after her.

A group of killers that counted in his army, among them a cosmetic salesman made up of worms, and an insane demon police woman.

Then came the Slayer who was meant to take her place.

She was supposed to help her… but that moron Kendra had attacked her and trapped Angel, thinking that they were enemies.

Also, that asshole of Willie put himself in the middle with his double cross, delivering her vampire straight into Spike's hands.

And there was the deconsecrated church. The place where that damned blond vampire tied up Drusilla and her Sire, where he daggered their hands and mixed their blood, to convey Angel's strength in her.

Buffy managed to reach the church with Kendra, Giles and the rest of the gang. There, she immediately threw herself at Spike, wanting to kick his ass once and for all.

She knew the ritual was going to kill Angel if they didn't stop it in time.

She got the blond tossed across the church with a strong kick and rushed to Angel, but when she reached the altar it was too late. Kendra was waiting for her with a stake in her hand, with Drusilla's ashes all over it. Behind her, Buffy could see her lover, his body still tied, dried of all his energy by his Childe.

That bitch of Spike's companion, who looked like someone out of some dark Victorian romance.

Buffy covered her mouth with her hands and couldn't hold her tears. Then, the blond vampire's scream tore the air.

She didn't remember the last events. She was so truly shattered she barely noticed the church was burning, or that Kendra was falling in the fight against the policewoman demon, or how Giles and the others kept busy with Spike's minions.

She was yanked and dragged away from there. And then there was only the dark.

-o-

Buffy was concerned with the fate of her friends. She wondered how they would react, what they would feel, once they knew of her death. And the same for her mother.

She held hope that Giles would believe she was alive, and that he might blow the whole Sunnydale up with her friends to find her.

Then she went blue, thinking that they might not accept or understand her new nature, that her Watcher would stake her, following the strict rules of the Council.

She was even concerned with the people she couldn't help anymore. When, only two days before, she was complaining to Giles about the destiny that had been forced on her, because she couldn't have a normal life, find a normal job or have a family… And suddenly she felt the responsibilities of her call.

She was ashamed.

She should have prevented Angel's death and the death of the other Slayer.

She was defeated. Even if one of the most dreadful vampires of the world was stopped and her companion got a really hard blow.

She was ashamed for what she had become. Even if it wasn't her fault.

She was really, really angry at Spike. But she couldn't hate him.

In fact, she almost felt sorry for him, seeing him so sad and speechless in a corner, with his head in his hands, mourning for Drusilla. Shocked by a pain so similar to hers.

Then she came to her mind and she wondered how she could be all sympathetic with the one who had killed her boyfriend and turned her into a monster.

Even if he didn't kill him directly but only to restore his companion's health…

But the fact remained. As did the fact he was evil and he was still her enemy.

-o-

Buffy swallowed hard, her mouth too dry. She still had the taste of his blood on her tongue from when he made her drink to turn her.

She shuddered, thinking how his blood ran in her throat.

She had never thought one day she might be his property… in a sort-of way.

She knew she should drink from him again, sooner or later. At least to recover her strength so she could run away. Yet the thought of putting her lips on his pale skin and sinking her teeth in it and sucking… It wasn't so appealing to her. She would rather starve.

She wondered so many times why he didn't kill her. And why he transformed her.

Had he done it only to play with her? Imagining the pleasure of seeing her being one of the evil creature she was meant to fight?

Was he taking a vengeance for his lover, in this way?

The one who had killed Drusilla was dead at the hand of the policewoman demon, and Buffy was the perfect whipping girl to work off his anger.

But she didn't feel evil.

Maybe because of the spell that made her a Slayer had kept her being mixed completely with a demon, tied up her soul with her body forever.

Were there any other cases of Slayers turned into vampires? Was she the first of them? And, if she wasn't the first, had the others kept fulfilling their mission?

Because, after all, that was what she wanted to do.

Vampire or not, if she succeeded in getting away from there she was sure her destiny would not have changed.

The actual problem was, however, how to escape.

She knew she couldn't hesitate to thrust a stake into Spike chest, as soon as she could find a chance to do it, despite his being her Sire.

-o-

Spike stopped hating her the exact moment he saw the tears for Angel's death streaming down her face.

Then, there were only space for anger and desperation.

And the desire for vengeance.

Last night, when he turned her, he thought there wouldn't be a sweeter vengeance as transforming his enemy in one of the creature she was meant to fight.

But now, re-thinking of it, he was unsure if he had condemned her or saved her.

For some reason, the idea of depriving the world of that tidbit didn't attract him so much.

Only after several hours spent grieving the loss of his princess could he think with a lucid mind, and then he considered the latest events. And the consequences of his actions were nagging him, making the hairs on his neck stand erect.

He had turned the Slayer.

Not the one that had killed Drusilla, to whom he was eager to break the neck of with his bare hands, but the other one. The one that he had sworn to kill to please his companion.

He had created a childe with his own blood, as he had seen how to do several times, but had never done. And now she was his new family.

In fact, after Darla and the Master had gone, and after Drusilla and his Grand Sire did too, he was the last descendant of the Aurelius.

Not that Spike cared about that, he had no interest in following his predecessors footprints. He didn't want to destroy or bend the world under his feet. He only wanted to have fun and hang around, maybe travel.

Even if, now that his princess had gone, nothing seemed to be the same, or tasted the same. Not even the blood.

Except the blood of the Slayer, who, for some unpredictable reason, seemed to be the same person as before.

He slowly approached her, wondering if she was hungry. Something told him she would never drink from him even if she was.

Should he go and take some food for her? She was his childe and he was supposed to take care for her.

But Buffy didn't lose her soul and she wouldn't accept to feed on a human being.

«What did Angel eat?» He asked.

She frowned without saying a word.

«I asked you, what kind of food did Angel fucking eat?» He insisted. «I need to know what you want to eat. I understand you don't want to sink your fangs in a human, but I'm sure you don't want to starve, do you?»

_A human_. Buffy swallowed, remembering she wasn't one anymore.

She inhaled deeply in order to stay quiet, forgetting it wasn't necessary. And she regretted it immediately, because the only effect the action provided her was to wrap her in his scent.

She shook her head, trying to get rid of it, while her body started immediately to respond to it, in some sort of primitive claim.

Since she had awakened, every sensation that reached her was overdrawn. The scents, the noises, the colours… Okay, not that in the bare room she was chained in there were so many of them. Especially colours. But the few colours she was seeing hadn't ever been so bright. The plum of the curtains had never been so purple, the grey had never been so grey, and the black had never seemed so black.

In the same way, the blue of the vampire eyes had never seemed to her so blue.

Only now she could realize how deep they were, how his lineaments were perfect and how his lower lip was so full.

She stared at it, thinking of how it had rested on her neck in the moments that he had fed on her. She swallowed and forced herself to keep her gaze away from him, and to not think about Spike's lips on her.

He noticed she was staring at his mouth and opened it a little to say something, but he changed his mind, narrowing his eyes and turning his face. He walked away from her and went to settle on the armchair, where he lit a cigarette.

He wasn't going to be her servant. If she was really hungry, she would tell him.

Buffy stared at the curtains on her left, thinking about the new link that was born between them. A forced bond, connecting her to her enemy for survival.

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Spike didn't understand how they could have killed Drusilla right under his nose.

He couldn't believe those two chicks could find the nerve to do it. And, for God's sake, what the hell had crossed that asshole Willie's mind, when he thought to lead the Slayer straight to the church?

He had reached the Hell mouth only to recover the health of his companion after Prague's events, so he wouldn't see her suffer.

He had been an ass to underestimate them.

And now, without his Sire, who was his _savior_, and without Angelus, he didn't have any point of reference.

He spent his time studying his experiment, valuating his options. Whether he should keep her with him as a pet, kill her or let her go.

He had looked at the passed out girl for a long time, trying to decide what to do, for so long that he had memorized her features.

And for the whole time, a question had been niggling at the back of his mind. How could she, a vampire Slayer, fall in love with one of them? Fall in love with a beast like Angelus too.

«Did you really love Angel?» He asked her.

Buffy opened her eyes wide and turned her face to him, speechless. Okay, it was a painful subject, but Spike wanted to know and he wasn't going to give up so soon.

«I wonder how you could do it, knowing exactly who he was and what he had done in the past.»

Buffy grimaced with pain and lowered her face to look down at the floor.

«Or, maybe, you might not have been so completely aware of what he was.» He added.

«Of what he _was_, yeah. Because, when I met him, he wasn't it anymore.»

The girl had spoken, finally.

«Why did you do this to me? And why do you keep me here?»

Now it was his turn to answer, and he curved his lips in an evil grin.

«Who knows? To have fun, maybe.»

Buffy shivered at the idea that Spike could have fun with her, maybe do some violent plays or rape her, taking advantage of the fact that she was chained at the wall.

But he didn't do any of these things.

«I need to feed,» he said, standing up and heading for the door.

Buffy looked suddenly dreadful, knowing he was about to kill somebody and drink his blood. And she felt even more dread, thinking she would do the same thing, if she could go outside with him in that moment, because she was incredibly hungry.

Perhaps it would be better to feed on Spike, and soon, to recover her strength in order to escape. Now that he was weak and hungry. But her pride prevented her from stopping him and asking for it.

So, she only watched him leave, slamming the door after him.

-o-

Spike came back several hours later, so she could relax for a moment.

Buffy didn't know exactly how many, or how long she had spent asleep. She only knew that he was back, and she had woken up to him guiding her mouth to his neck.

«Gotta feed on me, Luv. C'm on.»

Even if she was his first Childe, he knew how it was going to happen. At that point, she was supposed to be shaking from the harshness of the hunger.

She was wrapped with his scent again - his gorgeous scent - and this added to the hunger, it gave her the courage to reach for his shoulders.

She hovered over his skin and took one deep breath, then sank her fangs in his flesh, uncertain of how she should do it, but driven by her own instinct.

And when his blood flowed in her mouth, she knew she was doing it right, so she began to suck. Softly at first. But the moment his blood drained down her throat and stunned her mind, she found herself craving greedily that nectar.

She bit deeper and sucked harder, feeling his blood flooding her limbs. Spike moaned, but she didn't mind. Her head so full of sensations, she wondered if it was going to blow up.

So strong and so quavering…

Like her blood was starting to pulse again in her vein, and she felt alive, for the first time since she awakened in this room.

Unaware of it, she softened her bite and began to trace a line on the vampire neck with her lips. Then moved them up the edge of his jaw, and to his mouth, where she pressed them to his. Then, drawn by her own instinct, she stroked his lips with her tongue.

When Buffy started to lick his neck, Spike grew tense.

He knew his blood would have a powerful effect on her, but he didn't expect such a reaction.

Still, when she had traced his jaw and had kissed him, lost in lust, he almost lost his control. And when she had stroked his lips with her tongue, well, his self-control was past and gone.

He spread apart his lips, a bit hesitant, letting his tongue met with hers, returning her kiss. And, the moment he tasted the blood in her mouth, even if the blood was his own, he was hard.

Then, his hands ran to the chains, wishing to free her wrists and feel her little hands over his body. But suddenly he doubted it was only a trick to get free and ready to escape, so he stopped himself and stepped backwards, though reluctantly.

He looked her straight in the eyes; confused, asking himself what the hell he was doing, devouring her lips when the woman of his life had just died.

Was this his way to mourn Drusilla? Wanting another woman so soon?

His face crumpled with self-loathing. He took another step backwards, wanting to put distance between him and the Slayer; regret flooded him, drowning him. He realized how he had betrayed Dru, instead of taking a vengeance for her.

How he dared to create a link so deep and intimate with this girl, one between a Sire and a Childe, like the one he had had with his princess.

He shook his head again and again, keeping it between his hands, stirred up and confused.

Buffy looked at him with wide-eyes. She was confused too, reeling from what had just happened. For what she had felt when she had kissed him, like nobody had never made her feel, not even Angel.

Angel, the one her heart was supposed to belong to forever, that in this moment was dust on the church floor, while she tasted Spike's lips.

She bit her lower lip, wondering why the taste of the kisses and blood wasn't the same as before, but much more pleasant and incredible.

Was it due to her new nature? Or to the fact that they were from Spike? And, for the latter, was it a consequence of the deep bond between a Sire and a Childe, the one she had heard of so many times?

Then the shame of what she was wrapped her again.

She blinked her eyes and looked at him as he stepped backwards, wondering what he was going to do. Afraid of where this bond could bring them.

But suddenly, Spike's mind seemed to become clear and he reached for her in a rush.

«This situation… I can't…»

He said, as his hands ran to free her wrists from the chains.

«I can't handle it anymore. Better if we both go on our own way.»

Okay, maybe this was not the best decision he could take, but it seemed to him as the best thing to do in that moment.

He crossed her glare for an instant, as she rubbed her wrists, and then he was gone through the door.

«Spike, wait!»

Buffy called him back by an impulse and followed him. She crossed the door, covered the corridor, and found herself outside that abandoned house, alone in the streets, on the darkest night of her life.

She needed a guide for the new world which had just opened in front of her eyes and she didn't know if she could just go back to her family and her friends.

But the vampire didn't seem to notice her and kept going his way.

Buffy hesitated, unsure if to follow him or not.

Both of them didn't know where to go, or what was supposed to happen.

They could only stray in the night across the blocks, trying to clear their minds and to find a shelter from the soon to rise sun.

Buffy imagined herself resting everyday beside Spike, and running every night behind him with a stake in her hand, trying to focus him on not feeding on human beings… then she shook her head with decision.

She was annoyed that he had turned her only to dump her in the streets, without a bit of a help or a piece of advice for what she was going to find, but at the same time she wasn't thrilled at the idea of spending her whole existence with someone who had been her enemy until now.

Because, after all, the fact that he had turned her didn't automatically make them best friends.

Despite what had happened and what they had shared - which wasn't only the blood, she knew - she was still the Slayer.

_A _Slayer, she corrected herself.

She was sure she would meet him one day, but not sure she would be able to stake him.

She knew that first of all, she should find out where she was, and then she could worry about the rest. So she took a deep breath and made her way alone in the night.

TBC


End file.
